Critical Case Reflection 5

 

 

All names have been changed to preserve the confidentiality of clients.


 

Description:

On Sunday evening, I was enjoying dinner with Jodi, a friend whose wedding I had attended in December but divorced by March. I had heard rumors of abuse in the marriage but never known to what extent. As we sat chatting, the conversation turned to how she was doing and slowly she shared more and more of what had happened in her marriage. As she talked of how he beat her on their honeymoon, wrecked the car trying to kill them both, suffocated her, beat her to the ground and more, I found myself feeling emotionally charged and involved. That night I could not sleep. Every time I tried, strange dreams filled my mind and I would awake scared that something bad was going to happen to me too.



Assessment:
My professional assessment of myself in that situation is that I transferred her terrible situation onto myself by allowing myself to become emotionally involved. Also, some emotions from past personal experiences that could have turned out in a similar manner (such as having an emotionally abusive/manipulative boyfriend) in my life were arising. I was experiencing transference.



Personal Position:
I know abuse happens but I had never before heard someone's story at that depth and from someone I personally knew. As a teen, I had been emotionally and verbally abused but I did finally get out of that situation for fear of it becoming physically violent. But I had never really thought that it could happen to me, that someone such as a spouse or loved one would try to kill me. Hearing Jodi's story made it all too real and has scared me that it could and does happen.

I did not block myself emotionally. Before I realized I was having these strong feelings I was so emotionally involved that it seemed too difficult to emotionally remove myself. At night when the nightmares came, I believe it was because of allowing myself to become so involved.



Varying Perspective:
From Jodi's perspective, she could see that I was becoming more and more emotionally involved. In doing this, it can have multiple effects. If Jodi was a client (but she is not because that would be an ethical conflict because she is a friend), from seeing me so emotionally charged could assume that I hear and understand what she is talking about and feeling or opossite of that, that I cannot possible understand what she had gone through. It could also be thought that I as the social worker am too easily driven by emotions and they could then manipulate me off that. Conversely, if I did not show any type of emotions that, I do not care about her and what she has gone through.

This is quite a dilemma. In the future, the best answer would be to be empathic so that they feel heard and understood, and also recognize that I as the professional have a calm clear head on my shoulders that I might effectively help them. The client and the social worker relationship is enhanced when empathy is employed.



Future Action:
There is a difference in becoming emotionally involved and being empathic. The next time I am in any situation, where someone is telling me his or her story I will remember this. At night when the nightmares came, I believe it was because of allowing me to become so involved. To help me not allow this to happen I need to learn to listen to hard things that resonate within me because I or someone I know has gone through them. I can see a therapist to work through the emotions that sprung up about my abuse as a teen so that I can help others without experiencing transference. And when I do find those topics that are triggers for me, I can work through them with my therapist as well. I also need to learn to leave it all behind me. Something I can do is shower and change clothes to signify that it is over and I am not going to think about it. One way that I know I can do so is by turning to the Savior and petitioning him to remove the load and take it from me that I might have peace and be able to continue on strong in helping others. Through the atonement of Jesus Christ, it can happen. And I can remember without the pain and emotions.


 

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